Feature 1: The ruggedly handsome bachelor

Don’t be surprised when the first rugged, good-looking man you see happens to be an eligible bachelor. And if he happens to be wearing a business suit or jeans, don’t let that fool you; there’s more to learn about this stranger.

Feature 2: The non-threatening female lead

The woman, whether a baker or a high-powered executive who seems way too annoying to get anyone’s attention, is not so beautiful as to pose a threat to us other women but pretty enough to win over the guy.

Feature 3: The failing business dilemma

There will be a failing business or someone overly concerned with work/money.

Feature 4: The bitter and lonely past

Somebody will have died around Christmas in the past, leaving the survivor bitter and lonely. When everyone else is happy, one person will be swearing off Christmas.

Feature 5: It’ll be wholesome

Okay, not literally swearing. That brings us to another Hallmark movie standby: No cursing!

Feature 6: Lavish Christmas decorations

There will be an inn, B&B, or a family home decked out with lights and garland that cost way more than any of the character’s combined salaries. Come to think of it, even when they leave the Family Room with the cozy fire, no matter where they go, even in the kitchen or to grab an errand in town, there will be holiday decorations in the background.

Feature 7: Baking Christmas cookies

There will be baking (or a bakery). Someone somewhere will be making Christmas cookies. If you’re romantic enough, you can smell them wafting through the TV oven.

Feature 8: Snowy montage

Yes, there’ll be snow–everywhere. And the obligatory snow montage will occur after the characters have had a few days to get to know each other. It will feel timeless, as if they’ve known each other forever, even though one will live under pretenses.

Feature 9: Secrets and fallouts

There will be a secret that, if revealed (and it will), will make the other person fall out of love and call off the budding romance. Close your eyes if you must; it’ll be brief.

Feature 10: No foggy breaths

When everyone talks, their breath won’t fog up when they speak outside in the cold. (That’s only for us mere cold-weather breathers).

Feature 11: Mom and Pop’s victory

Note that big business/real estate will fight the underdog (the small village). And though it won’t look like that Mom and Pop shop has a chance, the little guys always win.

Feature 12: Dinner reconciliation

The love interest/opposing forces will say yes to dinner. How else will they reconcile, make amends, and get together?