We celebrate all the New Year’s resolutions, hope, and dreams–all that can happen in 2022. It’s pure bliss.

And then, we go to sleep, and we wake up. And, it dawns on us that if we want those dreams to come true, we have to take action.

Nothing’s happening on its own. And then the fear sets in. Or we don’t even get to the fear part; we break our resolutions first. No one will remember what this year was supposed to be about past January anyway.

So here’s when I step in and tell you how we’re going to keep those resolutions–it’s a simple thing we call love. We’ll do anything for love. We’ve proved that again and again by how amazing we are with our family and friends.

So let’s forget about our fear and focus on what we love.

What have you been crushing on? Come on. You can be honest with me. I won’t tell anyone your little secret.

That’s what the girl code is all about.

Ah! The girl code. I forgot all about that for half a century, but no telling what a conversation with me will turn up. And the other night, I happened to be talking about the girl code. I had moved on, but Bill and Alex were still stuck on it, “Say what?”

As soon as I explained it, Anne nodded her head; of course, she knew all about it.

You probably know the code, too. It’s the unwritten rule that we live by when we’re single. When your friend pours her heart out to you about a guy she’s crushing on, he’s hands-off—no trespassing there, it’s what we girls do in the name of friendship. We don’t go after someone else’s guy, even if they’re technically not even an item.

I’ve long since forgotten about this code we lived by, but when it came up in my story, my dinner partners all but begged me to write about it in my next muse. And it came in just in time for my New Year’s muse.

I think it’s time we bring this code into the 21st century, especially since we’re no longer secretly crushing on guys. It’s not who but what we’re crushing on that matters to us now.

What’s that secret you’re holding way too close to your heart, and you haven’t put it into action?

I think about my writing partner. She writes an occasional muse, but her secret crush is her book. She’s been working on it as long as I wrote and gave up on mine.

We had a third partner, but we don’t count her anymore because she did something unheard of–she broke the code and got published.

It was an actual how-dare-she moment (for me at least). I mean, I was happy for my writing partner, mixed in with a bit of fear. We were supposed to daydream about our crush, gulp, not go after him too.

But maybe she was trying to tell us something. Don’t just dream and waste your days talking about the guy you know you’ll never have. Crush the code already and put yourself out there.

Funny enough, as crucial as this rule was to our female friendships, I can’t think of one incident when a girl secretly crushed on a guy, and a relationship ever came out of it. Usually, the guy was swept away by another girl who wasn’t our friend anyway.

Maybe it’s time we do more than dream about our crush and take a hands-on approach to get what we want for the new year.

We’ve gotten so used to inaction, Covid, anyone? But now it’s time we get re-introduced to the concept of being in action again.

This is your crush, remember? Don’t give up before you’ve even talked to him.

Don’t worry, some things about the code will never change–I’ll always be your friend who’ll support your new year’s wishes.

But I dare you to break the code. Don’t just dream about that crush, be assertive and bold and make yourself happy.

True, it was a lot more fun when our friend was crushing over the guy, and we got to take the hands-off approach. We could hear how much she pined away for him and never had any fear to face ourselves.

But now we know better. We need the all-hands-on-deck approach if we’re going to crush our crush in 2022.

I’ve got your dream in mind if you promise to have mine. Dear N, my occasional muse, it’s time to be the full-time muse that I know you are. And, dear S, I know you have a book in you, too. Publish that book! Or do whatever your crush desires!

Let’s make our dreams our reality. I mean it, let’s do this thing together. It’s our New Year’s resolution to each other. I’ll be accountable that you crush your dreams if you promise to check in on mine. (Hint: it’s not even to write a book anymore). And neither one of us will be the least bit surprised when in the end, we get the crush of our dreams.

We can crush this New Year together!